Another Rainy Day?

I'm convinced that I live in Seattle and no one's telling me that I've moved. It has rained every week for the past month. Not that rain isn't good. It's the drinking water for the Earth, however, when the ground is already soaked, the drinking water turns into a flood and that's never good.

On a brighter note, I saw a rainbow as I exited off 285. That always makes me smile. I would smile harder if I ever bumped into the pot of gold that supposed to be at the end. I'd kick the leprachaun though.

Night of the Living Dead

Yep that me today and was me yesterday. SLEEPY! I can't seem to get enough rest no matter what time I go to bed. I'm thinking it's the 5 am risings and constant disruptions during the night. I need uninterrupted sleep. Not meaning death or a coma, but maybe a coma like state of sleep that lasts 10 hrs. Then and maybe then, I will become energized. Right now I feel like a zombie. Not the cool ones in the Thriller video. More like the ones from Night of the Living Dead.

Blogging again...

I've encouraged someone to blog and journalize their thoughts, but I have not done the same. It's time to begin again. Blogging is something I initially did to alleviate the frustration that had become my life during '03. It served as my personal stress reliever and pulled somethings out of me that I did not know was there. Who knew I would be a poet. However angry some of them had become, they were still words strung together that expressed my innermost thoughts and had a little rhyme here and there.

So now...Amir is 14 and Nuri's 10. I'm now over the mid-30's hump and have grown a lot. Ok well some maybe not as much as I should have but it's growing right? Jerome is completely out of the picture, although he calls to curse me out. I tried the be your friend thing, but that will never be enough. His personality has it so you must be all or nothing. So I'm nothing and fine with being just that.

As far as anyone else from the past that lingers, there's one that keeps popping up and refuses now to disappear. I have no idea about this, but it is what it is and there you have it. Stuck. Don't know if stuck is good or bad right now. Well today and yesterday and even this past week, stuck has been good. Stuck has a way of turing bad at any moment. Not that I'm calling the bad stuck into being, I'm must be honest with myself that it is what it is.

Boogie Down Bronx

Anger Poems are back

In light of our situations here at work. I wrote this to let off a little steam

Today’s corporate edict
Is to bend over and take that mean dick
In the ass..it’ll be over real quick
Then off you go with a swift kick
Cus it’s their world my thoughts don’t mean shit
It’ll mean a lot more when the shield is broke with this big brick
Upside your head I’ll go with my crazy swagger stick
Fuck you ass holes, high level trick and prick
Signed of angry corporate black chick

Reading Party

The spirits keep trying to give you a blessing...

Yesterday's gathering at the D-Man's house was great. It was a few people with positive energy gathered together for a cause that was not their intimate own but was personally owned by each. How do you know you are loved? When people gather for your happiness, while you are living, is an ultimate show of love and being loved.

So anyway, after a couple (only a couple) of happy punch, I was GREAT! Nuri and Amir came too and enjoyed themselves. Talk about comfortable, Nuri was asleep in front of the fire. AHHHHH! That's when you know you are among goodness. I am thankful for that goodness.

So in comes Gypsy and her cards. Who's ready for a Tarot reading??? ME!!! I had been wanting it for a while, but desired someone who was not in it for the money, but in it for the gift. And then, Gypsy. So although I was a bit afraid, she read me like she worked for the government. She saw my thoughts like she was in my mind. Like she was allowed a sneak peak in my life book.

Everyone who went in came out with a glazed look. Not like that of she did something to me, but that of how did she know? How does she know? When will I know? :) I need her once a quarter! Her being there, me being there, nothings ever a mistake. There are no such things as coincidence.

I am thankful for the message and the messenger.

Old New Look

Apparently the blow dried look is apparently in style forever. I also think I'm cute with my hair anyway...but sexier with the straight hair. With that being said, my hair made me feel better. I know the song says, "I am not my hair", however the way you maintain your mane is an outside reflection of your internal state. I can wet the head and have the afro again, however, if I do not comb the afro, train the afro, mold the afro, then I have a hot mess. If I don't feel that peace within, then I will not have the patience to maintain the afro, because I am not maintaining my mental state. My homie Max said, "you start forgetting yourself
and you become invisible to others and yourself." That is quite true. When you are lost in the sea of your own sameness, you fade in the background surrounding you. Even with a fro that's a greater size than the famous Angela Davis.

So, I changed my game and stepped it up. Then I got the clothes to match the new look. But the first change was in the attitude behind the whole Muri Modification. So anyway...the old/new me.